“When you buy a used car, you're only buying someone else's headaches.” - Jane Austen's - Mafia!

The above quote from one of the worst films of all time, starring Jay Mohr and the late LLoyd Bridges, really sums up my experiences with my current automobile, a 1991 Dodge Dynasty. Since the day I signed my soul over for it I have regretted it. I had five days to decide if I wanted to keep the car, and during those five days the only thing to go wrong with it was the A/C went out, not a big deal since I have never had a car with A/C (or at least with A/C for the duration - my last car had it for one summer) and it has never hurt me before. I figured for the price I was paying for the car I could live without creature comforts. On day six the real trouble began, and I couldn't take the piece of crap back.

It was on day six that the first power window went out, I was livid, as the air-conditioning had just gone out, and now I couldn't roll down the front driver-side window, I was now beginning to feel tremendous loathing for this piece of crap. After six months the window came and went, sometimes working perfectly - sometimes not, but I had a bigger problem then the transmission just up and decided that two gears were all I needed, and it would cost $1700 (more than the damned car was worth) to prove the bastard car from hell wrong. At that point, I should have lit the car on fire and walked away, but I figured that it would be alright as long as I didn't have to buy a whole new car. Now that the transmission was fixed, the window stopped completely, and I took it in to see how much it would cost to fix it, it was only $500, so I laughed and left praying that I never went off a bridge in it, 'cause that window was going to be up forever. Then the power locks went out, a small problem I had been dealing with since day six, but this time they affected the actual physical lock, I now had to unlock the passenger-side just to get in. Then just days after the lock quit on me the driver-side door, which I used to get out, began to sag, and not close all the way, leaving me with the damned door-ajar sound every time I drove it. Months went by and I thought for sure the piece of crap was done falling apart on me, but I was wrong in late December 2000, I drove it into a ditch, and that only furthered the problems, it accelerated the deterioration of my electrical system and fried my fuel pump, so I paid for a new fuel pump. Of course, I didn't know it was an electrical problem yet, so I drove some more, and then I was pulled over for not having tailights, about that same time (before I got it to the shop) my headlights went out. I took it to the dealership so the “experts” could fix it right and I wouldn't have to pay for even further repairs. After nearly two months in the shop I got the car back, and I was ready to roll.

Those are the problems the car had, it still has problems including: door locks, windows, and the sagging door. And new problems are: the transmission is going out again and the electrical system is fried (headlights don't turn on; except high-beam). So please, pray for me and the car, as I hope it will spontaneously combust very soon.