I am tired of reading about twitter. I'm tired of hearing about twitter. I'm tired of twitter. It's satan's frothy brew of wasted time and energy. Seriously, what the hell is the point? I can see the merits of twitter for jackasses trying to sell you crap, but why would you actually want to join?

I recently started up an account with this complete waste of my time. Guess what? It isn't wasting much of my time, because it is stupid and juvenile. It is just another symptom of a society that seems to be trending towards exhibitionism and a serious false sense of importance of individuals. Time to face the facts, nobody gives a crap about when you are stopping to buy gas, or taking a dump. That is a fact.

Sure, if a company can get followers, it's just plain free advertising, they can send out mass text messages to people who are so stupid that they voluntarily sign up for your ads. These are the ideal customers, because they'll also be stupid enough to buy your piece of crap. Shamwow! could take off like a bullet, or maybe even the SlapChop. Or, if you're in a band, it would make sense to send out a mass text telling your fans of your next big gig, or you could sign people up at your own website and send the same message. Twitter as a concept is a great marketing scam, but as a standalone service it is just plain dumb.

This is the problem with the whole service, it has no way to make money. Sure, they could start charging to have followers, but that would drive people and companies to have the people they are already paying to set it up through their own servers and websites. No need for twitter. Or, if you're Ashton Kutcher you could act like it's super-awesome and get yourself 1,000,000 followers, and act like a jackass in public getting the word out that twitter is here, and it's fantastic! He really should be paying twittter, he's getting lots of free publicity from this idiotic service.

The bottom line is that twitter has no business model, and it is solely designed for self-absorbed, self-important, self-promoting, imbeciles. All of this is supported by studies of the service, showing that 60% of people who sign up never sign back in after 1 month, and 90% of the "tweets" are sent by 10% of the users. Self-indulgent weiners. It's boring. I cannot possibly imagine actually signing up to follow people, getting constant text messages from assholes you don't really care to hear the details about. Sure you can change your settings and remove yourself from their "tweets", but then you lose the point of the service which is to keep in constant, ridiculous, privacy free, and annoying contact. That creates whole other issue, you have to spend an inordinate amount of time tweaking the damned thing in order to not blow you flippin' brains out from the constant text messages about some idiot sitting on the can.

So, in summation: twitter sucks, my brief test of the service is over, and I'm among the 60% not going back.


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